I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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