I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
