Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
