i was born a porn star she said
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
