Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
