Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
