is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
