Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
