Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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