She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
