have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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