i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
