can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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