Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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