Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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