i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
