stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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