Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
