he wants to bone in the snuggie
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
