maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Houston, we have a blender
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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