why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
