I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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