no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
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