I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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