Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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