yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize