Sorry, I don't speak sober.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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