I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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