I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
