so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
