girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
