oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I'm both gender and math confused
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
