You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
