ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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