Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
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