Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Text me some of your sweat
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
