Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
We are all done wearing pants today
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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