You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
