its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
