just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
