Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
