woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
