That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
