Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
