Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
