I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
