you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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