All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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