What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
