He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
